Sunday, October 26, 2008

My favorite holiday...other than "give me some presents day"

Halloween is here again! I love this holiday because you're free to dress like the inner slut you are without repercussions. You can get away with acting like a drunken fool, cry because you dropped your cell phone in the toilet, and pass out in your costume (I'm totally not referring to myself.) And best of all, you can go to the Duane Reade, buy candy in bulk, and then eat the whole bag while convincing yourself it's ok since the candy is wrapped in bite sized pieces.

Here in New York, there's not much in the way of trick or treating, because let's face it, some nut might put a syringe in your Twix. They do have parades though, with every drag queen coming out of their drag cave for the occasion. (I didn't know if you knew this but drag queens love parades.)


Last year, I dressed as Amy Winehouse, and it was a hit. My costume did take over however, and I had one to many Jack & Champagnes (I know that's disgusting, don't tell me twice.)




This year, I plan to go as that trollish irritating stylist known as Rachel Zoe. I have the wig, the animal print swing dress, bug sunglasses, giant cocktail rings and platform shoes, so now I just need a fur jacket of some sort. It's going to be 'bananas.'

Yikes


What in the name of plastic surgery hell happenned to Lara Flynn Boyle's face?!! That girl is only 39, yet she looks like an Upper East Side doyenne after one too many dirty gin martinis.
I remember a quote of hers from a few years back about how she thinks normal people are boring and she'd rather die than not be famous. Well, Lara, your dream came true. There ain't nothin' normal about that face!

So ladies, lesson learned, don't eff with your face....until you're at least 50.











and just to give you some perspective, this was her in the 90's:



I'm Back Again You Whores

Hello everyone. I'm here! It's been a long six months without me, I'm sure. I actually got a semi-real job, so I've been busy. Busy selling my soul.

Anyway, I know you've missed me. Hell, I missed me! And I missed you. I missed your laugh. I missed your scent. I missed your musk. When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together.

That aside, let's kick off another day of trash talkin'. celebrity bashin' good times!