Britney made an arse of herself on national television, OJ Simpson was arrested for assault (karma is a bitch!), Kanye West cried like a little school girl when he didn't win a moonman, Chris Crocker was catapulted into worldwide YouTube infamy after his tearful rant about Britney, and Amy Winehouse managed to live another week.
So here are some new tidbits to start yer day of right!
My beloved Wino has been in talks with the producers of the next Bond movie to do the theme and even make a guest star appearance, but talks ended after all the recent troubles of drug abuse, domestic violence, and whatever else crazy shizz she's been up to. Recently, Londoners spotted poor Amy getting out of a cab with a bloody hand and bloody rag. I don't know what she was up to, but it looks like she might have pulled an OJ. Someone check on her husband!
Kayne made a surprise guest appearance at the Emmy's last night, which I could give two poops about. These award shows have gotten so bland and commercial. Who cares if Ellen Pompeo gets a statue for best actress? Now if Ellen Pompeo stabbed Sandra Oh with that same Emmy statue, then I would care. But until that day...
In what seems to be a never ending source of crazy news, Britney's custody battle begins today with a 'secret witness.'
"You may recognize him as we walk into court. But maybe not. He is not famous. He’s just someone who’s concerned about the kids." says Gloria 'the Hammer' Allred, K-Fed's lawya. Oooh, I wonder who this could be? He's not famous but we would recognize him..hmm, is this a paradoxical question, like a brain teaser or something? Maybe Gloria's next statement will be "a man was found hanging in an attic, with a puddle of water below him and no chair. How did he hang himself?"
Also in Brit news, she has been banned from the elitist Chateau Marmont, enabling young stars to do hardcore drugs and play knife games since 1927. Britney was kicked out after hotel guests were disgusted by her eating habits. Crazy B was smearing food all over her face and was making pig noises. I think that's just the way she eats normally, people!
And also today, da Juice was arrested for assaulting Tom Riccio and some other dude for selling OJ's memorabilia. Don't steal from da Juice! The whole shabanga bang was caught on tape, with OJ repeatedly yelling "think you can steal my sh$t and sell it?!" Apparently not. Here's a link to the recording, courtesy of TMZ:
http://www.tmz.com/2007/09/17/o-j-confrontation-caught-on-tape/#comments
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